You May Ask Yourself, How Do I Work This?...

Life these days has been far too comical for me to not share. But where to begin?...

To put it nicely, I've been having mixed success in my primary work here. I haven't received much training and am not sure how to rely on my expertise or whatever resources I have at my disposal to get things done...or, I'm not sure how to get things done, or what is supposed to be gotten done, because no one has really told me. Things here aren't like they are back in the states, so I can't just do what I would do there, even if I knew what I would do there, because it's all different here.

I brought this up at our meeting with our Peace Corps supervisor last week. We made a great plan. The problem is, as those involved see it, that the three-person unit I'm a part of here is suffering from a lack of leadership, and so my taking the lead within it would be much appreciated. So that I can see how my unit might function more effectively, I will be sent (at my recommendation) to an equivalent regional office to see how the same unit functions in a place where it does in fact function. Then I will lead the unit, developing a calendar of training activities for school leaders and coordinating school visits during the off weeks. I thought this plan sounded perfect, except for the part where I learn to do and then do the work of 3 people, by myself. There are two other warm bodies, yes, but in the Peace Corps things can get really complicated really fast.

This leadership thing sounded good to me last week, because I was already making motions toward taking control of situations around me. According to my counterpart, our unit is responsible for putting on a workshop each year early in the year to train new School Management Teams: that's newly appointed principals, deputy principals, and heads of departments. Not only our unit must attend and lead the workshop, but the area manager and the circuit managers must also attend and participate. There was a lot of reluctance within my unit to get the ball rolling, and this sort of reluctance is something that causes me frustration with my not knowing how to get the ball rolling myself (who to call for arranging catering and accommodation, for instance).

But I know how to schedule a two-day workshop. I would simply ask everyone who must be involved which part they would like to present/facilitate, and when. My counterpart warned me that making a schedule was useless, and that only with patience could we prevail. I saw how we prevailed last term with patience (we did much less than we should have and could have done), so I proceeded nonetheless. It's the least of our job, and it isn't slave labor or anything.

First, I met with our area manager, who was enthusiastic to see me taking responsibility, and emphasized to me that all 3 circuit managers must be involved. This was the part my counterpart was worried about.

#1/3 said he would not participate. He said he was too busy, and I could tell Doc (our area manager) that he said so. Enough said.

#2/3, who comes from Quality Assurance, was eager, happy, and affirmative in his willingness to participate, but also outraged to hear that #1 would not participate. He told me that I must tell Doc, because it is not fair, and I promised him I would.

I ran into #3/3 on my way out, and joined him in his office...when #1 walked in behind us. As we discussed the situation of scheduling and what he would cover #1, who is a grown man, much older than my father, muttered hatefully in the background the name of my unit and other indecipherables bitterly. I sort of took this as a compliment in a way: #1 is not known for his professionalism and charm, so it wouldn't have been fair for him to not treat me the way he treats everyone else.

In the morning, I presented Doc (area manager) with a full program, also with time slots for myself and my counterparts and the Curriculum Coordinator, Palma. He was not pleased to hear that #1 claimed he could not participate. About an hour later, #1 enters my office: You know, yesterday, he was very stressed, and a lot was going on, he had x, y, and z problems...But he understands that he must be on the program, and he would like to be. I signed him up for 30 minutes of whatever he wanted to discuss that wasn't on my program list in the first place, and had a good chuckle about it with a few colleagues and Tim. I'm not integrated enough to take interpersonal issues personally at work here. And I was only doing my job and what the boss said.

This weekend was a long weekend, which I really needed, because the last two days of the workshop have been nothing short of comedy. I arrive bright and early yesterday at the office, around 7:30am (crazy, huh?), to do some last minute preparations. #3 rushes up to me: He cannot do his 3 hours of presentation as scheduled that afternoon. He had texted my counterpart over the weekend, but she did not know who the message was from (and did not choose to call or text back) so this was my first discovery. #1 is also suddenly too busy, and would prefer to present tomorrow. That's fine, I say...and smile. My counterpart and I were not planning to present the first day, but we were prepared enough to, so it would not be too disastrous.

We get the projector from the office, and head to the local school to have the meeting. It turns out we get the wrong projector, and it takes a bit of a hassle to set up, good thing I don't fear technology! As it was, my counterparts were back at the office for the other projector before I get it figured out.

Doc's slot is first. He presented on leadership generally, and it really made me think. In Peace Corps we talk about sustainable development, about guiding and facilitating, about being patient and flexible...but not about being a leader. Maybe we shouldn't be leaders, and in a way we have little to no authority unless someone gives it to us, but in another way, we must be leaders.

Doc said that being a leader is like being a good driver, in that you must drive the car in front of you and the car behind you to drive your own car properly. Of course, no one has the power to drive other people's cars, and in a country where the number #2 and #3 causes of death are driving in front of and driving behind taxis (guess what #1 is...), what we're talking about is really defensive driving. But it makes a lot of sense to me, here, now. I have people holding me back, and people trying to follow my lead, sometimes, who don't always follow it in a way I appreciate. Managing your position in relation to others is important to be successful.

It made me think of whether I saw myself as a leader or not. I didn't volunteer back in January to run my unit because my work here is supposed to empower others, not take power from them. We're supposed to help others flourish and facilitate their growth toward what they want. I guess now I can facilitate what Doc and our higher-ups want my unit to do, for the benefit of the children at our schools. It's clear on the other hand that I won't be stepping on anyone's toes here, either, because my counterparts have had the chance to lead and do not desire to take it. They will do what I ask them to.

I can think of times I have been a leader, but in America it seems that you either do your job well or you don't do it well. I can point to my taking positions within organizations, but I think in academia it isn't the case that promotion has to do with good management skills, in fact being a good researcher and doing whatever job you have well can lead to you becoming a manager. I don't know. Maybe you'd have to be here.

We proceeded with the day, mostly as planned. My part was about how school policies should be developed, and it was interrupted, which is a pet peeve of mine that it does not appear will go away during my Peace Corps service, however much more flexible and patience I become otherwise. I didn't think lunch was required, since we might end at 2 (and lunch here is normally at 1 or later). In any case my counterpart had decided last week to not have catered meals. But then she decided to have lunch, and because it was planned last minute, there were not take-away containers prepared, and the food would have gotten cold on open plates during my half-hour to forty-five minute presentation. I do not like for my presentations to be interrupted.

No big deal. But there would be no lunch for me. I was offered pilchards, which I had more than my share of during my homestay at Preservice Training, and declined, so lunch was rice and mince, and not even rice for me. I was offered forcibly a strawberry soda, but I would not accept. They were very puzzled I didn't want sugar in place of food. Then the secretary commented very enthusiastically that it looked like I had been gaining weight. (This is supposed to be complimentary--or maybe complimentary to Tim, I don't really know--but it didn't feel complimentary when I didn't get lunch, and didn't want lunch, and just wanted to finish my presentation.)

So that was yesterday. My husband went to town with Palma that day, and came home with sweets and made prawns for dinner.

This morning began in Palma's office, with my wondering where my counterpart was, who was to drive me to the school. Palma is very into virus protection, because it's a big thing here, so she was curious to check my flash drive to see if my counterpart's computer gives viruses, so she could plan in advance for her presentation. We had asked her to present at 10 since #3 had originally wanted to go last in the day, not sure how long he would take.

She discovered I had new viruses, and I got a short lecture about this while waiting for my counterpart. I wasn't very tolerant of the lecture. I love Palma a lot, and I plan to even blog about it, but I just wasn't joyed with learning about the intricacies of life and computer viruses this morning (I might have heard the lecture once before).

My counterpart arrives, and takes me to the school, where it is discovered physical education is going on in the auditorium we present in. At this point my counterpart confesses to me she had wanted to have this meeting in our Area Office hall, but our unit head had suggested the school...so that he could duck out early. He manages to do what he is explicitly told to, but he normally wanders around while the two of us underlings present. I made an agreement with my counterpart that we would no longer listen to what our manager says. (I told her about the new plans for me to lead, and she seems fine with it. In fact she always tries to tell me by way of personal excuse about her challenges in working in our unit. It was never a job she really wanted. When they closed down all the teachers colleges here in 2005 it was the only job she could get, and remains the only one since.)

We get our auditorium and technology going, but where is #2, who is first to present this morning? I had suggested a few times that someone might call him (I guess it should have been me, but are you seeing the issue with being 3 people here?), and finally we call him. He's sick! And he didn't think to call us. And #1 has a headache. So we've asked our new school management teams to come at 8:30 and aren't exactly a model of sound management, ourselves.

Palma had agreed to come at 10, but inexplicably #3, who had been unable to go on yesterday, is brought in by our quote-unquote unit manager. Fortunately for us, #3 is probably the best of the bunch. He had been the manager of my unit for years until last year, when he and my manager were exchanged (being a circuit manager is a more important job), and he had even co-wrote the manual we were planning our workshop out of.

My counterpart did an impromptu recap of yesterday, while #3 and I got him set up. He brought his computer with his presentation, but no flash drive. After we saw that his laptop did not work with the projector, I offered to use my flash drive, to transfer his files to my counterpart's laptop. As soon as I opened his files on the second computer, he mentioned that maybe the files had viruses. I told him that it was possible my counterpart's computer had viruses. He smiled, and said "No, my computer has viruses." Thanks for the heads up!

He did a great job nonetheless. And so did Palma. There was some missing information, but #3 suggested to me that the stuff that we missed (because #2 fell ill) was the stuff of a full 1- or 2-day workshop at this point in our unit's life cycle. Plans for the future.

There are a few more things I strive to find hysterical (like my unit manager stumbling in from the school parking lot at tea time today and demanding that some female authority figure attending our workshop serve him the tea and sandwiches right in front of him, while the majority of us just laughed at him...), but I think you get the picture. It's a day in the life. I have dreams of grandeur, and then the realization that if I don't kill anyone in my vehicle which is couched between two taxis (leadership metaphor) I will count myself lucky. Am I a leader? Was this a success? It is likely that the thing wouldn't have happened if it weren't for me, and 80% of it happened. New school leaders got to meet and discuss issues and ask questions with department officials. This should happen more. I would like to make it happen more.

I'll try not to give such drawn-out accounts in the future, but it's hard to talk about work without telling a very long contextualized story. Of course, I can tell Tim what happens each day. But this isn't a diary, and unless I give a lot of detail I'm not sure the real essence of the situation (confusion, frustration, mystery, incomprehensibility, etc.) can really come through. I'm glad these days happen, and I still think my life and my job are awesome. But what I got myself into and how I did it...I guess I just got the necessary bloodwork and urine tests last year, you know? I'm glad I'm becoming a leader and Tim is becoming one, it's a unique opportunity. But sometimes I wonder if I'm not actually on the moon.